Want to to improve a work relationship, any work relationship? Look closely at the relationship and find the elephant in the living room. The elephant in the living room is some obstacle in the space of the relationship between you and another individual or you and your team or even between groups of people. It is the thing that everyone is aware of on some energetic level but nobody is speaking the hard truth or asking the tough question.
What is the conversation that wants to be had?
When I was a trader with Montgomery Securities, we got bought out several times. In the most unsettling transaction, we were advised that all of the management for our San Francisco trading floor would be headquartered in New York. Naturally, there was speculation as to what that would mean for all the traders working in the TransAmerica pyramid. New management assured us we would continue to work out of San Francisco but rumors swirled day in a day out gaining momentum and becoming more detailed.
Productivity diminished. Anxiety increased and the telephone lines buzzed with gossip. There was a huge rift between the San Francisco team and the new management in New York. I said to my trading partner, "You know, they said the door was always open and we should use it." My partner assured me that these comments were political lip service and encouraged me to keep my head down and worry about my job. I simply dashed off a short, detailed email about the intensity and specificity of the rumors that were paralyzing our department and asked the manager to please comment.
He did and the conversation that needed to be had was brought to the surface.
Simple, but not always easy. Sometimes it takes courage, the willingness to take a risk and more often than not, it frees up the energetic resources to discuss what really needs to be addressed in the relationship, on the team, or in the company.
What is the conversation that wants to be had in your work environment?
Regards,
